Sneaky Sayings

By Wednesday, February 23, 2011 0 No tags Permalink 0

Kids are so amazingly sincere, wish grown ups were like that most often. Recently found a note under his pillow:

“Dear tooth fairy please give me 19 dollarz”

No, the tooth fairy is not going to give you $19. If you are lucky and she remembers, you might get a dollar coin instead of a bill. It’s these sneaky sayings and unique thoughts that make children a wonderful experience, at least some of the time.

Just like the explanation of parenthood in Back up Plan with J-Lo, which I (unfortunately) identified too closely with:

Having a kid is horrible, horrible, horrible, horrible, horrible, horrible. But then there are moments that make it all worth it.

It’s sad to see many people wanting kids, and making plans when I feel like I don’t dedicate enough time or attention. Sometimes my 8-year-old acts like a teenager and due to books like “Emotional IQ” I am too certain is because of my very own attitude or behavior. After reading the review of Amy Chua’s “Tiger Mom” at Time,8599,2043313,00.html, it certainly lowered even more my very own motherhood expectations, increasing self disappointment with each paragraph.

Then there are times I am simply speechless. Just completely blank. My heart wants to say so much, but my brain knows best to keep quiet.

“Mommy, I had such a wonderful dream last night. I dreamt me, you and daddy were still together!”

Through the many times he questioned why we divorced I feel as I was able to calmly explain it, assuring  it was neither right or his fault, this time I was speechless. I could, once again, explain why we divorced. But instead I rejoiced with his dream. There’s nothing wrong with dreaming with the two people that love you the most. The two people you trust. There’s no one or anything that will ever replace that and I couldn’t be mad or angry at him for something uncontrollable as a dream. So I smiled and said “Really?”.

After a long and painful separation that lasted years, even though he was little, I am sure he still remembers mom and dad together. And I think he’s really unconfortable with the whole “stepmom-second family” thing. I know he’s a very well-loved child and I want to believe he will be a successful and fulfilled adult, but unquestionably there are many holes left in the life of a child after a divorce and there’s nothing better than being raised inside a marriage. I pray that God fulfills his emotional needs and gives him “emotional IQ” when I lack it.


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